Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Randomness

Wow! It only took me two days to figure myself out! And guess what? I'm incredible! {I'm totally tongue in cheek here!} I did remember that I like to sew. So, I've pulled out the 'ole sewing machine and will be attempting to do some cute Christmas gifts for some friends and family. I can't share though, 'cause it's a secret!

To get yourself in the holiday mood, head over to the Caffeinated Chef. He's doing a National Lampoon style Christmas light contest. Many, many years ago we had a neighbor whose Christmas lights were a little odd, so this contest is really in his honor. Hopefully you'll have just as much fun as we do when we go out looking at lights.

Yesterday, I got to spend about 45 minutes on the phone with some REALLY interesting people. Remember the Wal-Mart phone fiasco? So, it turns out that I had to call the third party retailer that Wal-Mart goes through, Letstalk.com. I came to find out that there are people out there who are more odd than me {and that's hard to do}. The guy I talked to made it clear to me and every person at Verizon {we had to talk to them too} that I signed myself up wrong. Because of course it could NEVER be a computer error!

And as we speak, my daughter is shaking Christmas presents trying to figure out what they are. So far, we have a brick, Picsos, beads, and a treasure chest.

Back to the story: Maybe I just need to be more humble and accept my role in the problem. Hhmmm....nope, not going to happen. Anyways, we're on the phone. I say we're because there was me, the Let's Talk guy, and the Verizon guy. And as we get transfered from one person to another, the Let's Talk guy gets madder and madder. Now, we're being transfered to our third person and he forgets that I'm still on there because while I can hear the Verizon hold music, I can also hear him in the background imitating an R-Rated movie. At this point, my head is pounding, I've been trying to get this fixed for about 35 minutes and I'm listening to this guy swear up a storm. As much as I wanted to lose it on this guy, I held it back {Oh! I'm patient!} and said, "Sir, I'm still here and I don't appreciate you swearing at me." There was a pause and a surprised, "What?" And I said again, "I can hear you swearing at me. And I really don't want to hear it." He apologized, was quiet, then disconnected {Thank heavens, he was making me crazy!} after he explained to the third Verizon person what I had done wrong that fateful day two weeks ago.

So, it might be taken care of, it might not be. If I have to call Let's Talk again, I'll need to remember to take some anti-anxiety meds before I get on. I might even offer some to the guy on the other line because apparently at Let's Talk, they really don't want to talk and they're slightly high strung!

Kendal just told me that she hopes we got her some good Christmas presents. What? A brick isn't a good Christmas present? If you want to know what that brick really is...well, you'll have to wait for Christmas just like the rest of us!

Sunday, November 29, 2009

What Matters Most

My husband asked me the other day what I wanted for Christmas. I thought about it and I didn't know. I didn't know what I wanted for Christmas because I don't know what I like to do anymore.

I think sometimes as mothers we forget who we are.

We're so busy wearing so many different hats that we forget to take care of the one person that's most important to us...us.

I was reading an article by President Uchtdorf and in it he talks about the things that matter most. I've let the things that matter most to me fall by the wayside in exchange for things that really don't matter.

So, I've decided to take some time to find out who I am and what matters most.

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

To the Universe

I'm reading the blogs today and I see a great one by my friend Marie. Where she vents and writes letters and probably feels all better at the end and I thought that was an excellent idea. Because, at the moment I'm feeling a little angsty and frustrated. So, in pure copycat mode, I present "To the Universe". Everybody join in  if they so feel inclined.

Dear Wal-Mart:

Wait, scratch out that dear. You are no longer dear to my heart. I am not a fan!

Hateful, hateful Wal-Mart:

How dare you entice me with 2 free Blackberry Storms and 2 free $100 dollar gift cards. And then, when I RENEW my account with my beloved Verizon, how dare you activate me two brand spankin' new phone lines without my knowledge. I did not click that I wanted a new account! I clicked that I wanted to renew my account! What the heck am I going to do with two accounts and four phone lines. When my 2 free Blackberry Storms come, I will deny! I will refuse! Your package will not darken my doorstep! And then, I'll call you to complain about my four lines! And make you cancel two. Or I'll make my husband do it. He's meaner than me anyway.

So there!
By the way, we are not friends!
Melissa

Dear, dear Verizon,
I love you. I especially love Erin, who is willing to take the smack down to Wal-Mart in my honor. Who got so justifiably angry {with Wal-Mart} when I asked why they were changing my number if they were just renewing my contract. Thank you for hiring awesome people!

I heart you lots!
Your very best friend,
Melissa

Dear Rude Book Fair Lady,

I do not appreciate you yelling at me in front of everybody. By the way, just a little note, I lived at the Book Fair that week! I ate, drank, and breathed Book Fair. I slept on Book Fairs front doorstep. And because I felt that closing out early on a Friday afternoon was okay by me {the one in charge} that's what I did. Next year, you're in charge! Good luck! You'll need it!

Oh, and by the way, how 'bout you stop calling the President to complain about me and my unprofessionalism.

Oh, and next time you stop in the Book Fair three out of the four days and wander for hours and not buy anything, it'd probably be in your best interest to buy something. 'Cause I'm closing early next year too!

Not Friends Ever, {But thanks for trying!}

Melissa

My dear, dear children,

Please stop wearing clothes, I can't keep up with the laundry.

Love,
Mom

Dear Family,

I'm buying paper. Hope you like picnics. I can't keep up with the dishes either.

Wearily,
Mom

Dear Leg Hair,

It's winter. Goosebumps hurt when you shave them off. Could you just stop growing?

Pleadingly,
Me

Dear Winter,

I hate you. I'm moving to Texas or Florida or the Bahamas.

Adios!

Family Pictures

I know I posted a few of these last week and I meant to post more but got a little distracted with life. So, here's the whole family and all our little quirks. Tyler, Travis, and Amanda are my siblings, and the rest are just awesome additions! Sarah Boling (Amanda's sister-in-law) did the pictures and she did a great job.




Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Lint Rolling Chickens

Today, Kendal and I were walking into the grocery store talking about chicken. We were having chicken for dinner tonight and she wanted to know all about how the chicken arrived to the point of us eating it. She asked if the chicken would have little feathers all over it. I told her they (whoever "they" are) get the feathers off before we eat it. She thought about it for a minute and then asked:


"How do they get it off? Do they use lint rollers?"

What a genius! Lint rollers would be less messy! They might have to be industrial strength though. But really, who would have ever thought you might use lint rollers to get the feathers off chicken so you could eat it? I sadly had to explain that no lint rollers were used in the de-feathering and instead other "fun" methods were used. I love how her mind works, always thinking about alternative ways to do things.

For another fun idea of hers, take a look at her "I can't clean..." post.

She's amazing!

Thursday, October 29, 2009

A Record Breaking Day

I'd like to clue you all in to a little secret of mine...I'm amazing! Yes, I am. And let me tell you why I'm so amazing. Today, I broke a record. Now, for us mom's out there whose normal record breaking abilities are confined to how many load of laundry you can fold in an hour or how many forks you can stuff into the dishwasher, these extracurricular records are like manna. And today, I exceeded even my amazing abilities.


Me, little 'ole me, who can't get enough laundry, dishes, and house cleaning done in a day to be classified as a homemaker is now holding a coveted title.

I now hold the title of "Quickest Plasma Giver".

Ever!

In all of Southern Utah!

And maybe even the world!

Thirty-two minutes and I was done! They awed at my ability. The word spread like wildfire.

"Who did it in 32 minutes?"

"I've never heard of that!"

"I've seen 33 minutes before, but never 32."

As I left they pointed and whispered, in awe of my miraculous donation speed.

And as I rounded the corner to walk out the door, I heard the most beautiful compliment:

"She must be really hydrated."

Sunday, October 18, 2009

New Pictures

We had our family pictures taken last week and I'm having a hard time deciding between a couple. What do you think?


This One?


Or maybe this one?


Or this one?


Just wondering if I could get a little help from my friends on the matter. It's been a little stressful trying to decide on my own. Weigh in below....please....for the sake of the family picture wall.

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